Blond and lawyer rights.

[Azrack]

ok this is the law that th blond bregade and lawyers have been dreaming for all there lives! The Blonde and Lawyer Bill of Rights!

1.It is hereby a capital offense to make or repeate a blonde or lawyer joke. Those who break this law can and will receive capital punishment.

2.It is hereby illegal to critisize a lawyer or a blonde. Punishable by life in prison.

3.Lawyers and/or blondes can organize groups against brunettes or lawyer haters legally.

4.All lawyers and/or blondes get a permit for everything, and cannot be charged of a crime unless by a fellow blonde and/or lawyer.

5.Brunettes nd/or Lawyer-haters have no rights.

I think this will satisfy everyone. http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/smile.gif
Tell me if I should add anything. http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

[aclu14]

Are you a blond lawyer, Azrack? http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/rolleyes.gif

[Serendipity]

In your dreams, Azrack!

Look, don't get mad, get even. Start a cult of non-lawyer, non-blonde jokes. It could be tricky: "Did you hear the one about the person with non-light hair and who wasn't a lawyer?" Send that starting line in to Comedy Central and you'd have dozens of punchlines in a week.

Anyway,
1: A CAPITAL offense??!? Little touchy, aren't we? Time of the month or something??

2: If my lawyer does a bad job, that lawyer gets criticized. So sue me. Ditto blondes The blondes round here do excellent work and will soon be fit to join the rest of society.

3: I wouldn't say this is un-American (not that I care, being a Brit), but it's a tad rum.

4: Élite penal codes, eh? Hm.

5: Ah. Dear me.

Well, Azrack, it's a nice try, a very nice try, but I don't think it'll gain too many supporters round here. See, we're kind of old-fashioned when it comes to matters of hair colour and, er, being a lawyer.

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I'm a Moderator. Twisted Moderator.

[paulgro]

#4, never... The permit man!!! http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/tongue.gif

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"I have not failed. I've just found
10,000 ways that won't work."

Ferrets Place (http://www.alferret.co.uk/ubbcgi/ultimatebb.cgi)

[Ada_Doom]

I thought most of those already applied to lawyers anyway! http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/wink.gif

[Azrack]

Hehe, yes im a blonde lawyer. AND I WILL FIGHT FOR THE RIGHTS OF LAWYERS AND BLONDES EVERYWHERE! http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/mad.gif
I'll add a #5 to the bill.
5.A permit will be issued to any who take the class and are approved by a jury of Blondes and/or Lawyer. And yes paulgro I have a permit to issue a permit, and I have one to make laws too, so ha! http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/smile.gif
And NO it's not that time of month! Im a guy!

[Serendipity]

Well I'm afraid, Azrack, that you'll have to fight your corner here just like you would in court, using argument, rhetoric, Stentorian tones and Portian wit, an' all that. You can't just make up a load of rules that none of us will stick to anyway (at least, none of us nonblonde nonlawyers).

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I'm a Moderator. Twisted Moderator.

[Azrack]

I have a permit to make laws that non-lawyers and/or non- blondes won't stick to. http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/cool.gif

[paulgro]

Your permit is worthless if you didn't get it from me!! So I say http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/tongue.gif to your permit!!! http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/wink.gif

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"I have not failed. I've just found
10,000 ways that won't work."

Ferrets Place (http://www.alferret.co.uk/ubbcgi/ultimatebb.cgi)

[Lis]

I say http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/tongue.gif & :P to your http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/tongue.gif to your permit......I'm with ya Azrack! You should stick around http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/wink.gif.......us blonde Non-lawyers are muchly appreciative http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/wink.gif

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You've gotta love this city for its body and not its brain.

[Azrack]

Will u gimme a permit? please?

[paulgro]

I'll sell you one for 5 Pizza's..... http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/cool.gif

Lis, http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/tongue.gif & :P

------------------
"I have not failed. I've just found
10,000 ways that won't work."

Ferrets Place (http://www.alferret.co.uk/ubbcgi/ultimatebb.cgi)

[Azrack]

LOL, its a deal. here ya go. hehe i always have a ready supply of pizzas. http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/smile.gif

[Ada_Doom]

Tut tut Paulgro! If you're going to let yourself be bought, you should at least raise your prices (except of course, when I am the one that's trying to buy you!) http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/wink.gif

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Heaven is where the police are English, the cars are German, the chefs are French, the lovers are Italian and everything is organised by the Swiss. Hell is where the chefs are English, the police are German, the cars are Spanish, the lovers are Swiss and everything is organised by the Italians.
The man is a God (http://www.jpwsfc.org)

[paulgro]

I'm just reeling him in....Wait till you see how many Pizza's it costs him the next time!!! http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

------------------
"I have not failed. I've just found
10,000 ways that won't work."

Ferrets Place (http://www.alferret.co.uk/ubbcgi/ultimatebb.cgi)

[Lis]

ahhhh the power of the producer *shakes my head* you exploiter you http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/tongue.gif & :P

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You've gotta love this city for its body and not its brain.

[Ada_Doom]

http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/biggrin.gif Do you demand your pizzas in instalments, so they don't get cold before you can eat them all?

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Heaven is where the police are English, the cars are German, the chefs are French, the lovers are Italian and everything is organised by the Swiss. Hell is where the chefs are English, the police are German, the cars are Spanish, the lovers are Swiss and everything is organised by the Italians.
The man is a God (http://www.jpwsfc.org)

[paulgro]

Cold hot eat them anyway!!!! http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/biggrin.gif I only take payment up front in full..... http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/wink.gif

------------------
"I have not failed. I've just found
10,000 ways that won't work."

Ferrets Place (http://www.alferret.co.uk/ubbcgi/ultimatebb.cgi)

[Ada_Doom]

Ah! So that's why ask for so few! It would be a waste if they went mouldy on you....

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Heaven is where the police are English, the cars are German, the chefs are French, the lovers are Italian and everything is organised by the Swiss. Hell is where the chefs are English, the police are German, the cars are Spanish, the lovers are Swiss and everything is organised by the Italians.
The man is a God (http://www.jpwsfc.org)

[Idnew]

Surly you jest Az.

Did you hear that the Post Office just recalled their latest stamps? They had pictures of lawyers on them, and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on. http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50?Your Honor

I'm so glad to have a lawyer on here. We can lay off the blonde jokes for awhile. But being as your blonde and a lawyer. heehee aww this is going to be fun

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(ô¿ô)Compassion, Sympathy, Congratulations, Sarcasim,(pay close attention to this one) are just a few of the things we offer at Dumb Laws(ö¿ö)

My Home Spot (http://members.tripod.com/~freeatlast_3/Doing_Whatever.htm)

Dumb Laws First, Then Come To Ferrets (http://www.alferret.co.uk/ubbcgi/ultimatebb.cgi)

[Ada_Doom]

Az jest? He's a lawyer darling! They never joke.... http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/wink.gif

[This message has been edited by Ada_Doom (edited July 12, 2001).]

[Lis]

.....only about how "cheap" their fee's are.......hardy har har.....

poor guy, you'll never want to come back with all this meaness.....but being a lawyer you're prolly use to it huh ????? AHAHAHAHHA

Nah truely,I kid, as I said my Dad's a lawyer and I know there's little truth in such jokes for many lawyers http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/smile.gif

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You've gotta love this city for its body and not its brain.

[Idnew]

Yeah but when those suckers let a Judge walk all over you and say sorry that's all I can do and hands you their bill which turns out to be more than your getting then that just pisses me off to no end and that's what happened to me with two lawyers. Errrrrr

Ok I can not resist. Sorry.
A government study has shown that blondes do have more fun - they just don't remember who with.

How does an attorney sleep? First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other

How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer? She has an uncontrollable craving for baloney.

Stay tuned I have more. http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

------------------
(ô¿ô)Compassion, Sympathy, Congratulations, Sarcasim,(pay close attention to this one) are just a few of the things we offer at Dumb Laws(ö¿ö)

My Home Spot (http://members.tripod.com/~freeatlast_3/Doing_Whatever.htm)

Dumb Laws First, Then Come To Ferrets (http://www.alferret.co.uk/ubbcgi/ultimatebb.cgi)

[Ada_Doom]

lol http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

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Heaven is where the police are English, the cars are German, the chefs are French, the lovers are Italian and everything is organised by the Swiss. Hell is where the chefs are English, the police are German, the cars are Spanish, the lovers are Swiss and everything is organised by the Italians.
The man is a God (http://www.jpwsfc.org)

[Azrack]

Ugh.... I feel sickely. http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/frown.gif Sorry bout the other lawyers you've all had but some lawyers are different...Like me! http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/smile.gif
Oh man, now I have to clean up all this vomit...Now how many lawyers say that kinda stuff?!?! And as to you brunette non-lawyers! I have plenty of jokes against you! Hmmmm...that bluff should stop em for a while...

umm theres alot of replys but i guess azrack is a blond...and there just blond jokes....c'mon ..u dont go crying do u? hey and thats not fair about the brunettes having no rights..that means i wont have n-e rights....and i think azrck is hating on brunettes b-cuz we hardly get made fun of....mm ok...but there just jokes...no offense

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can't sleep! clowns will eat me!

Azrack did you smoke crack before you came up with this idea? I mean it's only THE
dumbest idea I've ever heard in my life.

1. Blondes never had and never will have jokes worthy of repeating.

2. Blondes and bad lawyers put themselves in the position of getting critisized.

3. They can have all the groups in the world and it still won't help them. Have you ever heard the saying "DUMB BLONDES"?

4. Don't you have to pay for permits. All of the lawyers and blondes in the world would be poor if they listened to you.

5. No rights are you stupid or something. Oh yeah I forgot your a dumb blonde.

Azrack your obviously not the smartest guy in the world to have come up with this law. and the third and fourth ammendments speak for that. Oh yeah you must not think this Bill of Rights is the best either if you have to continue posting replys to keep it from dying with everyone else who thinks its a stupid idea.

[paulgro]

This is a fake law forum, everything is done in fun here. So don't take what you read here seriously...

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"I have not failed. I've just found
10,000 ways that won't work."

Ferrets Place (http://www.alferret.co.uk/ubbcgi/ultimatebb.cgi)

[aclu14]

Touchy, touchy, babygirl.

[Lis]

[B}
Blondes and bad lawyers put themselves in the position of getting critisized.
.[/B][/QUOTE]


*nods* you're right, I should just shave my head, I'm just prevoking critisism by being blonde http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/rolleyes.gif.....attention seekers that we are.

[Ada_Doom]

Yes Dam' you! http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

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Heaven is where the police are English, the cars are German, the chefs are French, the lovers are Italian and everything is organised by the Swiss. Hell is where the chefs are English, the police are German, the cars are Spanish, the lovers are Swiss and everything is organised by the Italians.
The man is a God (http://www.jpwsfc.org)

[Lis]

ahhh shoosh you http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/tongue.gif

[Ada_Doom]

No! http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/biggrin.gif http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/tongue.gif with knobs on.

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Heaven is where the police are English, the cars are German, the chefs are French, the lovers are Italian and everything is organised by the Swiss. Hell is where the chefs are English, the police are German, the cars are Spanish, the lovers are Swiss and everything is organised by the Italians.
The man is a God (http://www.jpwsfc.org)

[Azrack]

I will forever fight for my rights!!!!! http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/smile.gif
BABYgirl is very scary,the way she holds that butcher knife...And this website is called DUMB LAWS!!!!! Though this a very serious and important law...

[Idnew]

Welcome Baby and we do hope you we're joking. Kinda sounded a little too intense.

Serious AZ lol lol hardy har har this is a great law, too bad nobody is going to enforce it. Brunettes rule!!!!!!

*still waiting for AZ to come up with some get the brunettes and scare them off jokes* http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

------------------
(ô¿ô)Compassion, Sympathy, Congratulations, Sarcasim,(pay close attention to this one) are just a few of the things we offer at Dumb Laws(ö¿ö)

My Home Spot (http://members.tripod.com/~freeatlast_3/Doing_Whatever.htm)

Dumb Laws First, Then Come To Ferrets (http://www.alferret.co.uk/ubbcgi/ultimatebb.cgi)

[Ada_Doom]

V.G. point Id. Lots of complaining about blond lawyer jokes, but no attempts to get any of his own back - maybe it's because there is no humour in being an intelligent and scrupulous person, i.e. a brunette outside of the legal profession.... http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/smile.gif

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Heaven is where the police are English, the cars are German, the chefs are French, the lovers are Italian and everything is organised by the Swiss. Hell is where the chefs are English, the police are German, the cars are Spanish, the lovers are Swiss and everything is organised by the Italians.
The man is a God (http://www.jpwsfc.org)

[aclu14]

I'm a brunette, and I'll be working in a law office come September, so boo yah! *lol*

[Lis]

Ahhhh such a silly topic....I luv it, the only time I can rationally cry "BLONDES FOREVER" and not be judged critically.....no, that's not true, at all.....am I rambling?????

[aclu14]

Keep on ranting, Lis!!! http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/biggrin.gif

[Ada_Doom]

I just thought what a silly word brunette is. I mean you don't call brown-haired blokes "brunets" do you?

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Heaven is where the police are English, the cars are German, the chefs are French, the lovers are Italian and everything is organised by the Swiss. Hell is where the chefs are English, the police are German, the cars are Spanish, the lovers are Swiss and everything is organised by the Italians.
The man is a God (http://www.jpwsfc.org)

[Azrack]

I thought of a brunette joke!!! Ok here goes...I've invented a new utensil to better all beverage production. It will extract the best part of the brew and expell the uneeded particles. I call it the Brew-net!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA GET IT BREW-NET!HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA O I CRACK MYSELF UP! Brunette ahahahahahahahaah...Why are u all looking at me? http://www.dumblaws.com/ubb/eek.gif

[aclu14]

you're pretty dumb, Azrack. But you implied it first!

[Ada_Doom]

And now....I drink like a monk.

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Heaven is where the police are English, the cars are German, the chefs are French, the lovers are Italian and everything is organised by the Swiss. Hell is where the chefs are English, the police are German, the cars are Spanish, the lovers are Swiss and everything is organised by the Italians.
The man is a God (http://www.jpwsfc.org)

[Scotslaw]

I'm with Azrack on this one. For too long we, the wonderful, diligent, hard working people who occupy that rareified and noble calling of the lawyer, defenders of truth and justice and what is right anywhere and everywhere, have been libelled, slandered, defamed, and maligned by non-lawyers. We are insulted and harassed; lets be honest, its a form of discrimination. Every lawyer joke you tell wounds me deeply, as it must wound all the other lawyers in the world, those sensitive and trustworthy individuals. We're people too! We deserve to be treated with dignity and respect!!!

I think the lawyers of the world should untie to launch a class action suit against the non-lawyers of the world, for decades of harassment, intimidation and name calling.

Now isn't that a scary thought, every lawyery in the world united together to sue everybody else....

Do you know what's an even scarier thought? They'd probably win...

Scotslaw (tongue fimly in cheek...)

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Ius est ars boni et aequi