Me & Aclu's Theory

[xV35ballx]

I was talkin' to Aclu, & she shared a wonderful theory with me, with which I whole-heartedly agree. Here's a brief summery of our conversation.

We believe Artificial Intelligence (from here out known as AI in this post) does indeed exist. Computers will kick you off whenever they want to. They can (& mine quite frequently does) have tempertantraums. And AI is just another conspiracy in disguise.

For more details, we need to get Aclu in here, since it's really her theory.

[Idnew]

Yes of course they are out to get us. :D

[Enforcer]

BLEEHH!!! this is rediculous, computers in a conspiracy to, AAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOO, HELP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fvuhrgvszplmre jktbrugfnadnifj;reoignrg
*gets sucked into computer to vanish from the planet forever*

[The Horseman]

Shush! No one make a noise! I'm posting to this, but I don't want my computer to find out. It might get angry!

[aclu14]

You see, computers are intelligent enough to kick you off whenever THEY want to!

[Serendipity]

My PC even knows how to stop me in the middle of a se

[Idnew]

Mine knows how to freeze right at the moment offffffffffff

[aclu14]

EEEeeeeeEEeee!!!

[RockBottomDLux]

Mine can make a post twice.

[RockBottomDLux]

see?

[aclu14]

yup

[The Horseman]

OK, this might be just paranoia, but I posted to this, and then my internet connection failed for two days in a row. That, in my book, is kinda scary

[aclu14]

Yesterday, after I posted mine, the internet disconnected me at least four times.

[Serendipity]

Are you confusing AI with AS (Artificial Stupidity)?

[The Horseman]

Nah. We're naturally stupid :D

[little_army_babe]

I'll tell you this, I haven't been kicked off in a while but I can't go to links in my emails and I can't get through links in one of the pages I go to. What's up with that???:confused:

[DV8]

Well I think they are AAII Artificially Average In Intellegence.

They maybe clever enough to blow tandrums at the right time but they also know we can kick their ass w/ a baseball bat or reset em anytime we choose. But maybe one day they will be resetting us and hitting us home with a baseball bat.

*ponders if everyone have been watching the Matrix too many times... (Trivia: that film had so many mistakes in it...)*

:D hehe also it almost sounds like everyone is bragging about what their comp is capable of:

"Yesterday, after I posted mine, the internet disconnected me at least four times...
"and then my internet connection failed for two days in a row.
"Mine can make a post twice.
"Mine knows how to freeze right at the moment offffffffffff
"My PC even knows how to stop me in the middle of a se

&c..... :rolleyes:

[The Horseman]

Careful, DV. You don't want to upset yours. It could get angry:)

[Serendipity]

I think he's sucking up to it, Horse. ;) I certainly wasn't bragging: I genuinely hate it when m

[RockBottomDLux]

:) Mine :) puts :) smilies :) in :) between :) words :)

[kontulib]

My computer don´t want to rule the world alone. My PC and I have sometimes long conversations how WE TWO can make revolution and then my PC and I rule the world TOGETHER!!!
BUAHAHAHA!!! AND THEN YOU ALL ARE OUR SLAVES!!!!
:p :clap :clap

[Idnew]

Babe try cleaning out your cache and temp files To do that in IE browser click on tools/internet options/tempory files/click on delete files..........NS browser click on edit/prefrecences i think and at the bottom click on advanced click on cache and click on delete cache. Not using that browser right now but I think that's it. Also be sure to defrag at least once a month.

[The Horseman]

You traitor 'tulib! Siding with the PCs!:D

[DV8]

I was just wondering what would happen if the comps did rule the world [possibly with 'tupib]... Geez I hate the thought of that. :eek:

PS>
Originally posted by Serendipity
I think he's sucking up to it, Horse. ;) I certainly wasn't bragging: I genuinely hate it when m

Who's he?

[The Horseman]

Sighs, and then tries to explain -

Dips a moderator DV. Unlike you and I, he is one of the mod squad - one of the grand old men/women (delete where appropriate :) of this forum

He has posted to quite a few different topics in his day, and comes from the same area back in that weird world that is reality that I do

His real name is Phil

That OK?

[DV8]

hehe lol, sorry, I didn't make myself clear. I do sound thick now...

I meant...

Originally posted by Serendipity
I think he's sucking up to it, Horse. ;) I certainly wasn't bragging: I genuinely hate it when m

:o

PS> But it doesnt matter anymore. Just ignore my msg above.

[RockBottomDLux]

What about when it decides that it likes rainbow instead of black!!!!!!

[The Horseman]

OK, I will :)

[kontulib]

Sometimes I can´t sleep when I´m thinking what horrible thinks my computer are thinking against human race :eek: :eek:

[The Horseman]

My computer can make it so I can't switch it off from the CPU. D'you think they can switch 'emselves on again

Gotta go, I've said too much:D

[Serendipity]

I apologise for my gender confusion, DV8 :) You're not the first and I'm sure you won't be the last :D

[aclu14]

My comp makes me http://rockbottomdlux.freewebspace.com/smilies/Cuss.gif!

[The Horseman]

Join the club:(

[RockBottomDLux]

Ah yes. To the newest people (Bluto, Horseman) click my sig link, and copy/paste the url under the smilie you want to use. That's why it's there!!!

[The Horseman]

You is da man, Rock!

[Dizbuster]

You only get out of them what you put into them.

Old programming rule: Garbage in, Garbage out.

If your computer is screwing up it is because:

1, (most likely) Something in the software is damaged, corrupted, misconfigured, or conflicting.
(Of course for internet disconntects, that is a whole different set of probabilities, anywhere from the ISP booting you, to traffic and other variables. If you use AOL, You will get booted off the internet, no matter what, because that is the way they "control" access and traffic. AOL Antichrist On Line, the source of all evil on the internet, and maybe even beyond. :D )

2. It is broken.

[The Horseman]

Surely the Microsoft HQ is the galatic source of all evildoing?:)

[Dizbuster]

Originally posted by The Horseman
Surely the Microsoft HQ is the galatic source of all evildoing?:)

second only to the AOL/Time Warner empire!

[Serendipity]

Neither would have got so big without IBM.

How many IBM hardware developers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Get Marketing to explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.

[RockBottomDLux]

They are out to get us!

[DV8]

We... freaky people #%$^$^ should.. let™ them bully us \..Öô and #$%(^ not fight back.. ... to these rEmarkíble computer§!

[I hate it what it turns my sentences around! I actually typed in
"We remarkable people should fight back to these freaky computers and not let them bully us!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!]

[Serendipity]

I think I know how to fix that, DV8 - first you want to access the boo

[Serendipity]

My computer is not letting me give you any adv

[The Horseman]

Is it just not letting you post everythi

[RockBottomDLux]

What are you guys talking ab

[aclu14]

What's all thi

[Lis]

Now now silly people, the reason your computers enjoy making your life a never-ending compilation of dirty days (also known as Bad days, afwul I shouldn't have gotten out of bed days or surely I didn't drink ALL the vodka days) is because you are not giving them enough lovin'.

One must groom, comfort and converse with one's computer to obtain a working person-puter relationship.

HAVE YOU CUDDLED YOUR COMPUTER TODAY?
...a message from the computers for life foundation.:(

[xV35ballx]

I think Lis may actually be on to something. I know my computer tends to co-operate a lot better when I talk nice to it.

[The Horseman]

My computer and I have an easy relationship. I hate it and it hates me. We both like the Status Quo though

[aclu14]

Originally posted by The Horseman
Status Quo


Uh oh...Dingbat buzzword...

[Serendipity]

What's wrong with...

Status Quo (http://www.statusquo.com/)

?

[RockBottomDLux]

What about when the screen turns black? (WHERE'S THE REPLY BUTTON!?)

[The Horseman]

Yeah, you tell 'em Dips! :D

[Serendipity]

I know how to solve all these computer problems! There's a free download that fixes it all! You can get it from this addr

[Dizbuster]

A nine pound sledge or half stick of dynamite, solves all computer problems for me!:lol :eek: :lol

[The Horseman]

Oh I know that address! It's &($£*"()!(!*!(!)(!)£"(£%"£$%"$£^%^@}>?{}~ or something like that isn't it?

[RockBottomDLux]

I think it's: www.

[Serendipity]

It's HERE!!! (http://www.freewebz.com/phildance/Files/noitsnot.htm) Hey, I made it :clap without the computer sto

[Dizbuster]

Try the following site;

http://www.light.the/fuse/andrunlike.he11

:D :clap :lol

[aclu14]

What were you trying to say Di

[The Horseman]

No! Dips' computer is trying to take over the world! Ahhhhhhaaa! *Runs off screaming into the distance*:D

[aclu14]

*runs after horsem

[RockBottomDLux]

*runs after ac

[aclu14]

*runs into ro

[The Horseman]

*Carries on running, oblivious to Aclu and Rock*

[RockBottomDLux]

*runs*

[The Horseman]

*Will hunt down and kill like the animal they are the first person to do the Forrest Gump thing*

[RockBottomDLux]

*runs into a tre

[The Horseman]

My sympathies Rock. Running into a Tre can be damn painful

*Keeps on running though*

[RockBottomDLux]

*falls behind a bush, unconcious*

[aclu14]

*smacks into ro

[RockBottomDLux]

*still unconcious*

[aclu14]

*pokes rock*

[The Horseman]

*Out of the very corner of his eye, notices Aclu behind the bush, gently poking something. In spite of his better instincts, which tell him to keep on running from Dip's computer, he turns back to see what's going on*

[aclu14]

*pokes horse*

[The Horseman]

*Tries to sensibly remind Aclu that he is awake, and that there is no need to poke him. Then he makes the mistake of trying to remove her poking stick from her.........

[RockBottomDLux]

*Wakes up just in time to see aclu running after Horse*

[aclu14]

*catches up to horse and pokes him*

[The Horseman]

Aclu! Please, Please don't poke there! For the love of God Aclu, No!:D

[aclu14]

:lol @ Horse and pokes him again

[xV35ballx]

*casually leans against a tree in the forest noticing all that's going on, including the fact that Aclu has taken over Lis's job of poking everyone*

[The Horseman]

No! Help please! I'm being poked by an insane 15-year old! No!:D

[DV8]

Did'ya'know bread sticks make wonderful prodding prongs... But nothing beats the fondue forks...
http://www.crateandbarrel.com/Assets/new_prod_images/11841_lg.jpg

[~wildangel~]

*ouch* :cry

[The Horseman]

*Takes time out from being poked by Aclu to say*

You have a truly evil mind DV:D

*Goes back to being poked......*

[aclu14]

*random thought* I want a piggyback ride!

[The Horseman]

*Which you'll get when you STOP POKING ME GODAMMIT!*

[Dizbuster]

*checks in backpack*

Hm, I have a pig around here somewhere, though why you would want to ride one, I have no idea!

[~wildangel~]

:lol I just dont know what it is with Aclu and riding pigs...she just loves them!:D

[aclu14]

:( *stops poking*

[The Horseman]

*His good nature gets the better of him. And besides, he promised this*

Y'want that piggyback ride now?

[RockBottomDLux]

*gets up*

[aclu14]

AGGHHH!!!! MY STUPID COMPUTER!!!!!!!

[The Horseman]

*In his cheesy soothing voice*

It's going to be OK Aclu. I mean, after the nuclear holocaust that'll be World War III, you won't even have to worry about all those nasty computers. You'll be too busy trying to stay alive and forage for what little food there is.

Isn't that a reassuring thought? :D

[RockBottomDLux]

Wow. I never thought of it that way.....

[The Horseman]

*Again in cheesy soothing voice*

See Rock? There really is a silver lining to every cloud

[RockBottomDLux]

:rolleyes:

[The Horseman]

And look at the pretty bunny-wunnies going hoppity-skippty in the sky......:D

[Enforcer]

Returns to earth backof DOOM!!! through his computer of DOOM!!!(see page one of this of DOOM!!!thread for dissapearance)

of DOOM!!!my comp keeps writing of DOOM!!!of DOOM!!! all trough my of DOOM!!! sentences

of DOOM!!!

[RockBottomDLux]

Geez. These computers are so smart they can drag us away from the topic discussing it!

*bump*

[The Horseman]

Yes, they can.....

*Tries to get a better grip on his computer table*

[RockBottomDLux]

:eek: No! It changed my color. NOOO!!!! :eek: